What a day. I cannot begin to describe our visit to Bibi's orphanage. We traveled to her old building first (where she spent the first 3 years) followed by a lengthy journey out in the country side to the second orphanage(where she spent her 4th and 5th years).
It was cold, rainy and damp inside both orphanages. I felt no heat anywhere and babies were swaddled in cribs to stay warm. There were over 100 children at Changsha SWI #1 and we only saw about 6 caregivers. Many of the nannies were glad to see Bibi and commented about how well she looked. At Changsha SWI #, we met a boy who was badly burned over his entire face. He held his arms up to me as if he wanted to go with us. I stood there with tears in my eyes, unable to move, as I questioned the unfairness and ugliness of his poor life. I thought about how much this little one needed a mommy and daddy to hold him and tuck him in at night.
As we were leaving, I met a boy who was about 12 years old. He was obviously mentally challenged. He kept following Bibi and calling out, "Mei Mei, Mei Mei" (that means Little sister, little sister). Bibi shyed away from him, but later told me she used to "love that boy". I gave the boy a chocolate bar as were leaving, but he had trouble getting his mind focused off of Bibi.
I have trouble thinking of our Bibi living under the conditions I witnessed today. She just seems so "Bibi", living in our modern day comforts, as if she has always been there. This was a true eye opener for me as to a huge part of Bibi's life.
I will mostly likely bring these children home with me, locked in my memory forever. But then, that is what I wanted, a chance to get a glimpse of the shadows of Bibi's past. As we walked out of the orphanage, I could not help to see the significance of Bibi leaving with her family while leaving behind the loud thud of the heavy steel gates.
Bibi is struggling tonight. She cried herself to sleep on the bus after leaving the orphanage. She is heart sick about not getting to see her nanny (the director said she is retired) and very dismayed to see the reality of where she came from. We want to help her as much as we can and are holding her as close tonight.
2 comments:
I'm so glad Bibi got to see her orphanage. It really is too bad her nanny wasn't able to make it. I cried when I read your blog about all the children that don't have homes yet. We're doing well here in the states. It's weird to think we're just starting our Sunday, and you've already finished yours. Bobby says he misses you and he's ready to meet his new sister. He enjoyed the pictures... It was really helpful for him to be able to visualize where you are and what you are doing. Look forward to your next phone call with Shu Ping!!
We're thinking of you guys as you are probably on your way to Civil Affairs right now!!! How exciting... waiting for your call. We're about to start advent.
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